Best Ever Albums

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

eyezayzay — Fri, 29 Aug 2014 12:36:35 GMT

Author: eyezayzay

Posted: 08/29/2014 16:36

It was when MJ had that accident with Pepsi.

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

Robert Anton Wilson — Fri, 29 Aug 2014 12:02:02 GMT

Author: Robert Anton Wilson

Posted: 08/29/2014 16:02

Maybe

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

Anonymous — Tue, 26 Aug 2014 11:29:31 GMT

Author: Anonymous

Posted: 08/26/2014 15:29

I can't believe you missed the obvious answer. It was February 1 1995, when Richey Edwards left Manic Street Preachers.

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

eyezayzay — Tue, 26 Aug 2014 10:00:02 GMT

Author: eyezayzay

Posted: 08/26/2014 14:00

All very fair points. I feel like there could be some other potential reasons and I'm honestly not sure which one I'd choose.
Regardless, it was a pretty good read. Keep doing cool satire like this. 😄

Jack White called out how awful the VMAs are at his show last night. Slayed me, haha.
"What is it? A contest to see who has the biggest ass?"

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

karbutt — Mon, 25 Aug 2014 22:58:36 GMT

Author: karbutt

Posted: 08/26/2014 02:58

at first i was like "not this again. fuck this. fuck you."
and then i read it.

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

WindowAbove — Mon, 25 Aug 2014 13:51:53 GMT

Author: WindowAbove

Posted: 08/25/2014 17:51

🤣
<3 u Kiki

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

Necharsian — Mon, 25 Aug 2014 13:10:19 GMT

Author: Necharsian

Posted: 08/25/2014 17:10

Second only to "Rabbit Lee" as my favorite outlaw threads. Amazing stuff wow

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

Norman Bates — Mon, 25 Aug 2014 12:32:32 GMT

Author: Norman Bates

Posted: 08/25/2014 16:32

hahaha wtf

Splendid OP kiki

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

alelsupreme — Mon, 25 Aug 2014 12:21:22 GMT

Author: alelsupreme

Posted: 08/25/2014 16:21

Definitely our failure to stand up to Bob Dylan - you ever listen to Love & Theft? Worst thing to happen in 2001, no doubt.

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

drakonium — Mon, 25 Aug 2014 02:15:28 GMT

Author: drakonium

Posted: 08/25/2014 06:15

This is amazing Kiki 😮

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

AlexZangari — Sun, 24 Aug 2014 23:32:41 GMT

Author: AlexZangari

Posted: 08/25/2014 03:32

�'�

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

Anonymous — Sun, 24 Aug 2014 22:54:47 GMT

Author: Anonymous

Posted: 08/25/2014 02:54

I refuse to believe the same person that pondered if someone shooting a stray bullet into the air could shoot an alien wrote this post. Brilliant. Biggest laugh I've had on BEA in a long time.

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

Anonymous — Sun, 24 Aug 2014 21:53:04 GMT

Author: Anonymous

Posted: 08/25/2014 01:53

Love it. And thank you for introducing Aneka into my life.

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

Tap — Sun, 24 Aug 2014 21:27:06 GMT

Author: Tap

Posted: 08/25/2014 01:27

"It's so weird, the history of music is so long and reaches back thru centuries, but coincidentally it all stopped being good sometime during my 20's" - Basically Everyone

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

Anonymous — Sun, 24 Aug 2014 21:01:19 GMT

Author: Anonymous

Posted: 08/25/2014 01:01

Great post, Kiki. I appreciate how carefully you've considered the possible villains here, but I think we all know what the correct answer is.

They seemed innocent enough at first, a band of swanky young brits jonesing to blend American rock and roll music with a British melodic sensibility that made the girls swoon. As their popularity continued to grow, however, they found the mersey beat formula insufficient for expressing the complex emotions that inevitably arose when four attractive young men spent exorbitant amounts of time in close confines with one another. Unfortunately, a devoted teenage fanbase mistook their homoerotic themes for musical maturation and by the time Sgt. Pepper rolled out, they had inadvertently brought "art" into the pop music mainstream.

By the early '70s, all popular music was made either to be listened to or to be sold, with little middle ground to speak of. Self expression was secondary to either pretension or commercialism, depending upon the ambitions of the artist. Sure, there were revolts. In the late '70s, several gangs of white men who were poor at maintaining eye contact were heard faintly over the din of soft rock and bell bottoms, but this "new wave" was soon to be absorbed into the very monster it was resisting.

Now we are all lost. Hipsters parade around, pitchforks in hand, and hold sham protests outside the walls of pop music factories, but there is nothing left to fight for. Music is become but a tool for the powerful and the affected. The Beatles have made sheep of all of us.

Baaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

Anonymous — Sun, 24 Aug 2014 20:46:54 GMT

Author: Anonymous

Posted: 08/25/2014 00:46

Brilliant piece of satire. Everyone gets skewered with delicious wit.

Now that you've outed yourself what r u going to do with the Kiki/outlaw character? ( 😜 )

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

Anonymous — Sun, 24 Aug 2014 19:54:53 GMT

Author: Anonymous

Posted: 08/24/2014 23:54

Agreed, well done Kiki. One of the best things I've read on here for quite a while. Good work 😎

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

Anonymous — Sun, 24 Aug 2014 19:52:42 GMT

Author: Anonymous

Posted: 08/24/2014 23:52

Nice post I guess?

Re: Where did it all go wrong for music?

Skinny — Sun, 24 Aug 2014 19:27:59 GMT

Author: Skinny

Posted: 08/24/2014 23:27

I liked this. A couple of hours well spent Kiki.

Where did it all go wrong for music?

Anonymous — Sun, 24 Aug 2014 19:17:56 GMT

Author: Anonymous

Posted: 08/24/2014 23:17

The year is 2015. The month is July if you are inclined to ask. It's summertime (AGAIN!?), Sun is out, people are frying on the beach and someone somewhere is moaning about those people because they have no mates. So yeah, its mostly what was happening in 2014 and 2013. However... things are far different in the music world. Far far different from what they were. Let me explain...

By the time July 2015 comes around it is widely acknowledged that music is finished. It's broken beyond repair. What decent artists there are only have a morsel of creativity between each other and what is left is nothing more than a manufactured Billboard 100 hit parade. It's widely believed the realization came around April 2015 in an argument on the comment section of a 'Black Skinhead' video on youtube. A 16 year old user, who we shall name 'Clifton', pointed out how "artists" such as Miley Cyrus and Selena Gomez (by using quotation marks around artists it is believed he was implying they weren't artists at all) had taken over the music industry, "indie" is isn't indie anymore and Kanye West, the only true artist left, sold out with Yeezus and lost all integrity as a music artist in an effort to orally gratify a music website known as 'Pitchfork'. Inevitably there was resistance and 7 hour long argument ensured. This young man named Clifton, who's favorite artists included Bach, The Beatles, Popul Vuh, Sleep and Joy Division and who was an avid enthusiast of "blazing it" (a term meaning to download vast quantities of music, possibly illegally) held firm, posted his points and put across an airtight argument to why there was no good music being released anymore. In the end everyone had to admit he was right about everything, even convincing man twice his age who once loved St Vincent and Mac DeMarco but now knows better.

The fallout was swift and devastating. Clifton's words were spread through social media and music communities throughout the internet. Within the week many bands had split up (TV on the Radio, Tame Impala, Real Estate to name a few) while Pitchfork initially rebuked Clifton in a snarky article before removing all traces of music from their website in favour of reviewing knitwear. It is highly unlikely they will release their 'Best Albums between September 2014 and November 2015' list at all now.

New music is prohibited from Rate Your Music, bandcamp has gone bankrupt and everyone has either moved onto chart music or music which was released before the year 2000. Everyone now knows music as an artistic venture has died and all that remains is a bunch of popstars pushing the latest car advert jiggle and soft core porn music videos.

One question remains though. What was the beginning of the end for music? Where did it all go wrong for music? This question has largely being ignored until now. Here I shall present 10 possible points which may have lead to this demise:

1. The Beatles