Best Ever Albums

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

tonagamu — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 15:32:49 GMT

Author: tonagamu

Posted: 01/17/2012 20:32

Des'ree's "Life" is a particularly grating example:

"I don't want to see a ghost,
It's the sight that I fear most,
I'd rather have a piece of toast,
Watch the evening news."

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

tonagamu — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 15:31:18 GMT

Author: tonagamu

Posted: 01/17/2012 20:31

Des'ree's "Life" is a particularly grating example:

"I don't want to see a ghost,
It's the sight that I fear most,
I'd rather have a piece of toast,
Watch the evening news."

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

gussteivi — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 15:22:25 GMT

Author: gussteivi

Posted: 01/17/2012 20:22

Link

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

Norman Bates — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 14:12:07 GMT

Author: Norman Bates

Posted: 01/17/2012 19:12

I'm definitely buying this single. In vynil if possible.

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

Romanelli — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 13:36:29 GMT

Author: Romanelli

Posted: 01/17/2012 18:36

Yes was horrible when it came to lyrics.

But, lyrics don't really get any worse than this....

MY HUMPS

What you gon' do with all that junk?
All that junk inside your trunk?
I'ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,
My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely little lumps (Check it out)

I drive these brothers crazy,
I do it on the daily,
They treat me really nicely,
They buy me all these ices.
Dolce & Gabbana,
Fendi and that Donna
Karan, they be sharin'
All their money got me wearin' fly
Brother I ain't askin,
They say they love my ass ‘n,
Seven Jeans, True Religion's,
I say no, but they keep givin'
So I keep on takin'
And no I ain't taken
We can keep on datin'
I keep on demonstrating.

My love (love), my love, my love, my love (love)
You love my lady lumps (love),
My hump, my hump, my hump (love),
My humps they got you,

She's got me spending.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me and spending time on me.
She's got me spendin'.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me, up on me, on me

What you gon' do with all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I'ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
What you gon' do with all that ass?
All that ass inside them jeans?
I'm a make, make, make, make you scream
Make you scream, make you scream.
Cos of my hump (ha), my hump, my hump, my hump (what).
My hump, my hump, my hump (ha), my lovely lady lumps (Check it out)

I met a girl down at the disco.
She said hey, hey, hey yea let's go.
I could be your baby, you can be my honey
Let's spend time not money.
I mix your milk wit my cocoa puff,
Milky, milky cocoa,
Mix your milk with my cocoa puff, milky, milky riiiiiiight.

They say I'm really sexy,
The boys they wanna sex me.
They always standing next to me,
Always dancing next to me,
Tryin' a feel my hump, hump.
Lookin' at my lump, lump.
You can look but you can't touch it,
If you touch it I'ma start some drama,
You don't want no drama,
No, no drama, no, no, no, no drama
So don't pull on my hand boy,
You ain't my man, boy,
I'm just tryn'a dance boy,
And move my hump.

My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump.
My lovely lady lumps (lumps)
My lovely lady lumps (lumps)
My lovely lady lumps (lumps)
In the back and in the front (lumps)
My lovin' got you,

She's got me spendin'.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me and spending time on me.
She's got me spendin'.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me, up on me, on me.

What you gon' do with all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I'ma get, get, get, get you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
What you gon' do with all that ass?
All that ass inside them jeans?
I'ma make, make, make, make you scream
Make you scream, make you scream.
What you gon' do with all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I'ma get, get, get, get you drunk,
Get you love drunk off this hump.
What you gon' do wit all that breast?
All that breast inside that shirt?
I'ma make, make, make, make you work
Make you work, work, make you work.

(A-ha, a-ha, a-ha, a-ha) [x4]

She's got me spendin'.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me and spendin' time on me
She's got me spendin'.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me, up on me, on me.

So bad that it inspired me to write my own terrible song for Will.I.Am to record on the next Pee's album. I think it fits right in with their lyrical style. (Includes notes for Mr. Am to help with recording and video production.) If he can make gazillions doing this, why can't I?

"Peaches N' Skeet" (or Proof That I Can Write "Songs" Just As Goodly As Will.I.Am.)

(Pre recording notes: There is to be no actual melody used in this song, but it will be drenched in autotune. the number will open with approximately 25 of my closest friends (we'll call them dancers) dressed as farmers and farmer's daughters carrying peach baskets and tossing fruit into the audience. Some of it may be rotten by showtime...remember to sign rotten fruit waivers and have them in the attorney's hands prior to air.)

(The lead male vocalist (I have been advised by my legal team NOT to use the word singer) will be wearing typical Will.I.Am headgear and goggles. This will not be an issue as I have been advised that simply calling it a "tribute" will be enough to avoid legal action. A second male vocalist will join the lead vocalist on stage to simply wear sunglasses and say "yeah" after every 4th word. This is done to build street cred.)

PEACHES N' SKEET

Come on baby baby
Come on baby come come
I know you tighter, baby
Than a snare snare drum
Pick it off the tree
Pick a peach for me

Peach juice gimme gimme
Peach meat gimme gimme
Skeet skeet juicy juicy
Mmm baby, drip drip yeah

(at this point, let me just say to Mr. I.Am that I know you want this song for your own. Please contact my attorney.)

*GRAMMY WORTHY CHORUS RIGHT CH'ERE!*

Peaches N' Skeet
Juicy underwear meat
On white, rye or wheat
It's a juicy juicy treat treat
Boogie down, uh uh
Boogie wet, yeah

(please hold applause until after the chorus repeats a second time.)

Grill you up, skeet skeet
Eat up all your peach meat

(the above two lines will be repeated no less than 30 times.)

(obligatory female part. Senor I.Am won't write a song without one, so why should I?)

Come on get my peachy peachy
I'm gon' make you screachy screachy
Screachy parakeet you screachy
Uh. Uh uh. Yeah. Screachy.

(at this point, the female vocalist wets herself and exits. a large cloud of smoke covers the entire stage, out of which emerges Slash, who plays a melt your face off guitar solo that lasts no longer than 9 seconds. apparently, Slash gets paid in 9 second increments, and I can't afford double the Slash time. besides, he's Slash, dammit. 9 seconds should be more than enough to win at least 3 MTV Video Awards.)

(the entire song is then repeated except for the obligatory female part and, of course, Slash. The female has nothing dry to change into. which brings us to our amazing finale, during which the dancers are now writhing and grinding against each other covered in peach feces.)

Peach skeet!
Eat eat!
Peach meat! Peach meat!
Meat meat, yeah.

(thunderous applause and Grammy nominations will soon follow.)

Yes, the lyrics to mine are dumb...but still not as bad as "My Humps", or any number of BEP songs!

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

Anonymous — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 12:49:50 GMT

Author: Anonymous

Posted: 01/17/2012 17:49

The lyrics of most progressive rock groups - Yes and Emerson, Lake & Palmer are my favorites on that topic.

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

alelsupreme — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 11:24:05 GMT

Author: alelsupreme

Posted: 01/17/2012 16:24

Runaway by Kanye West comes to mind:

"I saw pictures in my email, i sent this bitch a picture of my dick"

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

Chemical Smile — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 10:45:40 GMT

Author: Chemical Smile

Posted: 01/17/2012 15:45

Link

🤣

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

gussteivi — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 10:25:36 GMT

Author: gussteivi

Posted: 01/17/2012 15:25

GARY wrote:

.

Link

Hey baby wake up from your a sleep
We have arrived onto the future
And the whole world is become....

Elektronik, Supersonik,
Supersonik, Elektronik,

Hey baby ride with me away,
We doesn't have much time,
My blue jeans is tight,
So onto my love rocket, climb,
Inside tank of fuel is not fuel, but love,
Above us, there is nothing above,
but the stars, above

All systems gone!
Prepare for downcount!

5....4....3....1! Off blast!

Fly away, my space rocket,
You no need put money in my pocket
The door is closed I just lock it,
(Ha) I put my (Ha) port plug in your socket (Ha Ha Ha)

The sonic sky is bright like fire
You and me gets higher and higher
Cut communication wire
Only thing can stop us is flat tire

Ha, Ha, Ha Ha Ha Ha

Hey love crusaider
I want to be your space invader
For you I will decend the deepest moon crater
I is more stronger than Darth Vapour
Obey me I is your new dictator
For you is Venus, I am Mars
With you I is more richer than all the tzars
Make a wishes on a shooting stars
Then for you I will play on my cosmic guitars!

Ladies and Gentlemen
Fasten your beltseats
We has commenced our decent
I trust you enjoy this flight
As much as you enjoy this accent

Now back on Earth its time for downsplash
Into sea of eternal glory my spaceship crash
People have arrived for cheer me from near and far
And as I float I open door and shout
"I am worlds biggest, washed-up superstar!"

(Supersonik, Elektronik)

As for sure as the sun rises in the west
Of all the seas and all the boats I am the bestest
come, let me put ring of Jupiter on your finger
Then like a smell around you I will forever linger
Ok, is time for end, no more will I sang
Let me take you back in time,
I want for you to experience big bang

Long live space race
Long live, Molvania

.

WOW, it's a joke isn't it?

😨

ISN'T IT!?!?

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

yepyepyep — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 06:56:59 GMT

Author: yepyepyep

Posted: 01/17/2012 11:56

The lyrics as a whole are not really that bad, but the bolded part made me laugh out loud when I first heard it.

Low- Embrace

Holding my head for the last of race
Pushing my body to get that embrace
It won't last -- hold on fast
It won't last -- hold on fast

Breathing in time, so hard to trace
Crushing your skull with my warming embrace
It won't last -- hold on fast
It won't last -- hold on fast

I fell down the stairs
I wished I were dead
You ran for the light
He handed me your head
It won't last --
It won't last -- hold on fast
It won't last -- hold on fast

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

GARY — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 01:25:45 GMT

Author: GARY

Posted: 01/17/2012 06:25

.

Link

Hey baby wake up from your a sleep
We have arrived onto the future
And the whole world is become....

Elektronik, Supersonik,
Supersonik, Elektronik,

Hey baby ride with me away,
We doesn't have much time,
My blue jeans is tight,
So onto my love rocket, climb,
Inside tank of fuel is not fuel, but love,
Above us, there is nothing above,
but the stars, above

All systems gone!
Prepare for downcount!

5....4....3....1! Off blast!

Fly away, my space rocket,
You no need put money in my pocket
The door is closed I just lock it,
(Ha) I put my (Ha) port plug in your socket (Ha Ha Ha)

The sonic sky is bright like fire
You and me gets higher and higher
Cut communication wire
Only thing can stop us is flat tire

Ha, Ha, Ha Ha Ha Ha

Hey love crusaider
I want to be your space invader
For you I will decend the deepest moon crater
I is more stronger than Darth Vapour
Obey me I is your new dictator
For you is Venus, I am Mars
With you I is more richer than all the tzars
Make a wishes on a shooting stars
Then for you I will play on my cosmic guitars!

Ladies and Gentlemen
Fasten your beltseats
We has commenced our decent
I trust you enjoy this flight
As much as you enjoy this accent

Now back on Earth its time for downsplash
Into sea of eternal glory my spaceship crash
People have arrived for cheer me from near and far
And as I float I open door and shout
"I am worlds biggest, washed-up superstar!"

(Supersonik, Elektronik)

As for sure as the sun rises in the west
Of all the seas and all the boats I am the bestest
come, let me put ring of Jupiter on your finger
Then like a smell around you I will forever linger
Ok, is time for end, no more will I sang
Let me take you back in time,
I want for you to experience big bang

Long live space race
Long live, Molvania

.

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

Mr. Shankly — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 23:05:45 GMT

Author: Mr. Shankly

Posted: 01/17/2012 04:05

Probably something written by Stephin Merritt and The Magnetic Fields. For example, this one:

Not for all the tea in China
Not if I could sing like a girl
Not for all North Carolina
Not for all my little words

a lot of Presidents of the United State of America songs are brilliantly stupid. Robyn Hitchcock's lyrics are lot of times so weird and goofy, they're brilliant. Jonathan Richman is another one. Here's just a few examples:

"You Can't Talk to the Dude":

You can't talk to the dude
no it's no longer in style
You can't talk to the dude
No, no it's no es normal.

"She Doesn't Laugh at my Jokes":

I think I'll call up someone important, maybe Sigmund Freud (pronounced "Frood")
Say hello, hello, I'm a hilarious dude.

Well, she's up there in the morning, cooking breakfast cereal
I'm up there boring her with my comic material

"I'm a little Dinosaur":

Well, I'll a little dinosaur, I'm a little dinosaur, and I'm planning to go away.

They Might be Giants comes to mind too. This one's like a song a little kid would make up, which makes it brilliant.

"Particle Man":

Particle man, particle man
Doing the things a particle can
What's he like? It's not important
Particle man

Is he a dot, or is he a speck?
When he's underwater does he get wet?
Or does the water get him instead?
Nobody knows, Particle man

Triangle man, Triangle man
Triangle man hates particle man
They have a fight, Triangle wins
Triangle man

Universe man, Universe man
Size of the entire universe man
Usually kind to smaller man
Universe man

He's got a watch with a minute hand,
Millenium hand and an eon hand
When they meet it's a happy land
Powerful man, universe man

Person man, person man
Hit on the head with a frying pan
Lives his life in a garbage can
Person man

Is he depressed or is he a mess?
Does he feel totally worthless?
Who came up with person man?
Degraded man, person man

Triangle man, triangle man
Triangle man hates person man
They have a fight, triangle wins
Triangle man

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

Applerill — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 22:45:58 GMT

Author: Applerill

Posted: 01/17/2012 03:45

Jackwc wrote:

Summer Girls

HEY!!! I wub that song!! Sure, most of that comes from how easy it is to make fun of, but still, those lyrics are great! Whenever my friends go out for Chinese food, I randomly start quoting lines from this song.

Re: "Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

junodog4 — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 22:30:46 GMT

Author: junodog4

Posted: 01/17/2012 03:30

Meatloaf - Life is a Lemon

Link

I want my money back! I want my money back!

It's all or nothing, and nothing's all I ever get
Everytime I turn it on, I burn it up and burn it out

It's always something, there's always something going wrong
That's the only guarantee, that's what this is all about

It's a never ending attack, everything's a lie and that's a fact
Life is a lemon and I want my money back

And all the morons and all the stooges with their coins
They're the ones who make the rules,
It's not a game, it's just a rout

There's desperation, there's desperation in the air
It leaves a stain on all your clothes
And no detergent gets it out

And we're always slipping thru the cracks
Slippin'
Then the movie's over, fade to black
Life is a lemon and I want my money back

I want my money back, I want my money back

What about love?
It's defective - it's always breaking in half
What about sex?
It's defective - it's never built to really last
What about your family?
It's defective - all the batteries are shot
What about your friends?
They're defective - all the parts are out of stock
What about hope?
It's defective - it's corroded and decayed
What about faith?
It's defective - it's tattered and it's frayed
What about your Gods?
They're defective - They forgot the warranty
What about your town?
It's defective - it's a dead end street to me
What about your school?
It's defective - it's a pack of useless lies
What about your work?
It's defective - it's a crock and then you die
What about your childhood?
It's defective - it's dead and buried in the past
What about your future?
It's defective - and you can shove it up your ass!

I want my money back - life is a lemon
I want my money back - life is a lemon, life is a lemon

It's all or nothing, and nothing's all I ever get
Everytime I turn it on, I burn it up and burn it out

It's a never ending attack,
Everything's a lie and that's a fact
Life is a lemon and I want my money back

And we're always slipping thru the cracks
Slippin'
Then the movie's over, fade to black
Life is a lemon and I want my money back
Back, back, back, back!

I want my money back, I want my money back
Life is a lemon

It's so bad, I listen to it when I need a laugh. 😁

"Best" Worst Lyrics Ever

Jackwc — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 22:23:41 GMT

Author: Jackwc

Posted: 01/17/2012 03:23

For songs with lyrics SO GAWD AWFUL they may induce a few chuckles. Post lyrics, bold your favourite parts and share.

Link

New Kids On The block,had a bunch of hits
Chinese food makes me sick.
And I think it's fly when girls stop by for the summer,for the summer
I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch,
I'd take her if I had one wish,
But she's been gone since that summer..
Since that summer

Hip Hop Marmalade spic And span,
Met you one summer and it all began
You're the best girl that I ever did see,
The great Larry Bird Jersey 33
When you take a sip you buzz like a hornet
Billy Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets
Call me Willy Whistle cause I can't speak baby
Something in your eyes went and drove me crazy
Now I can't forget you and it makes me mad,
Left one day and never came back
Stayed all summer then went back home,
Macauly Culkin wasn't Home Alone
Fell deep in love,but now we ain't speaking
Michael J Fox was Alex P Keaton
When I met you I said my name was Rich
You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch

New Kids On The block,had a bunch of hits
Chinese food makes me sick.
And I think it's fly when girls stop by for the summer,for the summer
I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch,
I'd take her if I had one wish,
But she's been gone since that summer..
Since that summer

Cherry Pez,cold crush,rock star boogie
Used to hate school so I had to play hookie,
Always been hip to the B-boY Style
Known to act wild and make girls smile,
Love New Edition and the Candy Girl
Remind me of you because you rock my world
You come from Georgia where the peaches grow
They drink lemonade and speak real slow
You love hip hop and rock n roll
Dad took off when you were 4 years old
There was a good man named Paul Revere
I feel much better baby when you're near
You love fun dip and cherry Coke,
I like the way you laugh when I tell a joke
When I met you I said my name was Rich
You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch

In the summertime girls got it going on,
Shake and wiggle to a hip hop song
Summertime girls are the kind I like,
I'll steal your honey like I stole your bike

Bugaloo shrimp and pogo sticks
My mind takes me back there oh so quick
Let you off the hook like my man Mr. Limpet
Think about that summer and I bug,cause I miss it
Like the color purple,macaroni and cheese,
Ruby red slippers and a bunch of trees
Call you up but whats the use
I like Kevin Bacon,but I hate Footloose
Came in the door I said it before,I think I'm over you
but I'm really not sure
When I met you I said my name was Rich
You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch

In the summer girls come and summer girls go
Some are worth while and some are so so,
Summer girls come and summer girls go
Some are worth while and some are so so,
Summertime girls got it going on
Shake and wiggle to a hip hop song
Summertime girls are the kind I like
I'll steal your honey like I stole your bike