Best Ever Albums

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

AlexZangari — Fri, 30 Aug 2013 07:50:14 GMT

Author: AlexZangari

Posted: 08/30/2013 11:50

I think we should tie meccalecca to a chair and take turns spitting on him.

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

Facetious — Fri, 30 Aug 2013 06:37:29 GMT

Author: Facetious

Posted: 08/30/2013 10:37

I have found myself involved in this intriguing case only recently, when I learned of the Masked Cobra's mysterious message and happened to read Jack's inspirational article. I'd just like to say that it is important that we don't lose hope in these dark times. In fact, I plan to contact an_outlaw so we can discuss what his knowledge of this matter is. Hopefully I'll be able to learn a lot. I'd also like to request my fellow BEA users that they contribute in arranging for the security around the Jar to be increased too. Truly I'm sure we all believe that this most precious object should be protected, and preserved for future generations to take nourishment from; hopefully not in the disgusting way that the cookie-thief did though.

(BTW the alethiometer thing was a joke, I don't actually own one. Sorry if anybody got their hopes up that I would ask it who stole the cookies.)

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

Jackwc — Fri, 30 Aug 2013 05:48:07 GMT

Author: Jackwc

Posted: 08/30/2013 09:48

THE MOST CONTROVERSIAL MAN ON BEA
MECCALECCA
HERO OR CRIMINAL?

We've all heard the comparisons, I'm sure, that have been made by the sensationalists, comparing Meccalecca to such controversial figures as Adolf Hitler and GARY - and whether or not these comparisons are apt, his impact is clear: the world of cookies has never quite been the same. On August 26th, Meccalecca was found guilty of orchestrating what may perhaps be the most elaborate cookie theft in modern history. Meccalecca and co-accused pathological Peruvian Defago (who has since been controversially acquitted) were alleged to have, through the internet, stolen a single chocolate chip cookie from the highly secure home of an_outlaw using nothing but raw cunning and a Kenny Loggins mixtape.

"I saw the whole thing," one anonymous witness stated Wednesday, "this guy, this Defago - he was definitely Peruvian. Pathologically so."

"Record label owners are notorious for stealing cookies."

But not everyone agrees that Meccalecca and his suspected accomplice were dirty criminals/dirty Peruvians:

"I just think it's great that someone is really taking the cookies into their own hands," a spokesperson for the People's Cookie Front said this morning, "that such heinous crimes could be put out against someone for claiming what should rightfully be theirs... I think it truly shows what a bad state this forum is in when cookies aren't for everyone"

An_outlaw was unable to be reached for comment, as he was likely doing important science and philosophy. I was on the phone with his PR manager for three hours but we just ended up talking about trees and how it's funny that they start growing towards the sun but then start going outwards, what's that about? More importantly, why do we call them cookies if we bake them? Shouldn't they be called bakies? I left with more questions than I came with. Certainly, my journey for the truth has only started.

Upon doing some extensive research I found that Meccalecca's favourite album was by Blur, a band fronted by Damon Albarn, a man notorious for possibly eating cookies sometimes. But that was only the beginning. Look closely and you'll realize that Meccalecca's name is a reference to Pee Wee's Playhouse, a show about a guy who quite possibly could have eaten cookies in his spare time. To go further down the rabbit hole - in the episode of South Park in which Stan coaches a "Pee Wee" hockey team, Song 2 by Blur is played extensively. That's right, same Blur featuring Damon Albarn. Draw your own conclusions if you may, but I think that what this suggests is obvious.

Certainly, he's a different man to everyone. To this writer, Meccalecca is a man who is asking us as a forum, as a society, the truly difficult questions. Have we gone too far? Is our way of life crumbling like so many milk-soggy cookies, dashed upon the floor to be swept up by the maids of fate? Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

- Jacklyn, Best Ever Gazette

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

Facetious — Fri, 30 Aug 2013 00:45:44 GMT

Author: Facetious

Posted: 08/30/2013 04:45

swedenman wrote:

Can't talk long, could be followed. Overheard meccalecca consorting with hooligans, another cookie jar strike is imminent. Will give more info when safe.

-swedenman (aka The Masked Cobra)

I have consulted my alethiometer and I can confirm this, meccalecca is definitely going to strike again.

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

Anonymous — Fri, 30 Aug 2013 00:21:17 GMT

Author: Anonymous

Posted: 08/30/2013 04:21

Can't talk long, could be followed. Overheard meccalecca consorting with hooligans, another cookie jar strike is imminent. Will give more info when safe.

-swedenman (aka The Masked Cobra)

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

Applerill — Tue, 27 Aug 2013 07:59:03 GMT

Author: Applerill

Posted: 08/27/2013 11:59

We got video evidence.

Link

He also produced that Bernie Madoff mixtape.

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

alelsupreme — Tue, 27 Aug 2013 06:52:17 GMT

Author: alelsupreme

Posted: 08/27/2013 10:52

Yeah, record label owners are notorious for stealing cookies.

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

gussteivi — Tue, 27 Aug 2013 04:55:00 GMT

Author: gussteivi

Posted: 08/27/2013 08:55

Recent conversation I had with meccalecca:

mecca: Y... You... You got any cookies on you?

me: you don't look well, are you sure you're alright?

mecca: JUST ANSWER THE GODDAMN QUESTION!!!

me: wow, calm down there, no I don't. What the fuck is wrong with you?

mecca: Sorry, I just... well do you know where I can find some cookies?

me: Well, there's the cookie jar, have you tried that one?

mecca: THERE'S A COOKIE JAR!?!? WHY DIDN'T ANYBODY FUCKING TELL ME!?!?! Erm, I mean... where's this cookie jar exactly?

me: You seem really edgy man, are you sure you're getting enough sleep? Anyway, outlaw's got it, to make sure that nobody steals any cookies. You should talk to him, i'm sure if you ask nicely he'll give you one

mecca: Oh outlaw, I see... well, the thing is, there was an... incident. Could you maybe get one for me from him? And say it's for you? Please? Pease!?

me: I can't, I already got a cookie from him today, it was delicious, nice and crunchy and just the right amount of chocolate chip..

mecca: Ok, that's enough!!! Sorry I have to go... to sleep! Yes, that's what I'm gonna do, get some nice rest just like you suggested. Bye now! *runs away*

Looking back on this I'm pretty sure meccalecca stole the cookie in the cookie jar.

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

Jackwc — Tue, 27 Aug 2013 03:04:59 GMT

Author: Jackwc

Posted: 08/27/2013 07:04

It was most definitely meccalecca. Ever notice that cookie-stealing sparkle in his eyes?

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

Jasonconfused — Tue, 27 Aug 2013 01:56:01 GMT

Author: Jasonconfused

Posted: 08/27/2013 05:56

ShaneSpear wrote:

How do you know he stole it? Surely he's innocent until proven guilty.

Not if this were Italy.

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

Defago — Tue, 27 Aug 2013 00:05:15 GMT

Author: Defago

Posted: 08/27/2013 04:05

I did not steal any cookies. For God's sake, what do I look like? Some sort of cookie thief? We Peruvians are honest folk, we don't steal (cookies, at least). I did see who stole the cookie, though, with my very own eyes. It was that sketchy New Yorker, the thrice-damned meccalecca. He stole the cookie, and he's trying to steal my honor by letting me take the blame!

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

AlexZangari — Mon, 26 Aug 2013 23:21:52 GMT

Author: AlexZangari

Posted: 08/27/2013 03:21

God hates Defagos.

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

Anonymous — Mon, 26 Aug 2013 19:40:51 GMT

Author: Anonymous

Posted: 08/26/2013 23:40

Defago stole my virginity.

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

Jackwc — Mon, 26 Aug 2013 19:32:45 GMT

Author: Jackwc

Posted: 08/26/2013 23:32

I always knew Defago was a bad egg from the second he walked through that door, always professing his dual loves of eating cookies and catburglary. I can't tell you why, but I'm almost certain he stole the cookie from the cookie jar.

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

ShaneSpear — Mon, 26 Aug 2013 19:28:48 GMT

Author: ShaneSpear

Posted: 08/26/2013 23:28

How do you know he stole it? Surely he's innocent until proven guilty.

A better lyric would be: Defago allegedly stole one or more cookies from a container which allegedly had at least one or more cookies.

Re: Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

MrFrogger — Mon, 26 Aug 2013 19:25:20 GMT

Author: MrFrogger

Posted: 08/26/2013 23:25

Goddammit Defago I knew it was you

Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar?

Anonymous — Mon, 26 Aug 2013 19:19:32 GMT

Author: Anonymous

Posted: 08/26/2013 23:19

This is a wonderful game I've just remembered from when I was in Year 1. Basically someone gets accused of stealing a cookie from a cookie jar. Then they have to deny it and pass the blame onto someone else. Then that person does that to another and it keeps repeating forever. In the actual game it's like a song. It will help lighten the mood and is a perfect fun thread for lounge.

So what's going to happen is I am going to say User A has stolen the Cookie from the cookie jar. Only User A can deny it and they must choose a second user, say User B, who did steal the cookie from the cookie jar. User B must then accuse another etc etc etc. This keeps going until a user doesn't respond and we all agree they were the one who stole the cookie from the cookie jar.

Got it? 😁

Okay, the user who stole the cookie from the cookie jar is: Defago