Bad Poetry Contest

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Not sure whether this belongs in Games or Off Topic, but I'm sure mods will see to it that it's in its right place.

The pitch is simple: everyone who wants to join in will PM me a bad poem, of any length and any style of your choosing. I'll post each received poem on this or another thread and we can all vote on which poem we think was the worst. After voting is over, I'll reveal the names of the authors (unless for some reason you would prefer to remain anonymous).

Please include a title on your poem to make the voting process easier.


Submissions accepted until, say, December 13th. Date flexible.
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This is actually a great idea. Can be pretty funny. I encourage people to submit stuff.
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"I feel like for the last two years there’s been sort of a sonic evolution happening and I’ve been experimenting more and more."
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nutso you are a mad genius. are we limited to one submission per person? because believe me I can write some godawful poetry
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can i just send the entire sentimental thread?
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alelsupreme wrote:
can i just send the entire sentimental thread?


I musta missed that one. Back in the village with crappy internet connection.


dividesbyzero wrote:
nutso you are a mad genius. are we limited to one submission per person? because believe me I can write some godawful poetry


I was originally intending on it being one submission per person, but I really want to read your godawful poetry. Tell you what, submit as many as you like. If too many people complain about that, I'll just hold back a few of your poems.
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Five days remain for submissions!
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One day left. Final warning for procrastinators.
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nutso42 wrote:
One day left. Final warning for procrastinators.

I work better (worse?) under pressure
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As a previously published poet spending 5 minutes producing my life's masterwork whilst waiting for some indie-pop to download whilst the wife snores her head off was time well spent. Thank you for arranging this contest. I look forward to receiving a compendium of all the entries next Christmas so I can read them whilst on the toilet.
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dividesbyzero wrote:
because believe me I can write some godawful poetry


Oh I didn't realise
that you wrote poetry
I didn't realise you wrote such bloody awful poetry,
Mr. Zero.
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