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panman36
Gender: Male

Age: 44

United States
  • #1
  • Posted: 12/02/2015 18:47
  • Post subject: 5 famous Christmas songs that SUCK
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It's that time of year again. Like it or not, we will all be inundated with Christmas music for the next month. I happen to like Christmas music, generally speaking. But I can't let another holiday pass without calling out some songs that really suck. Feel free to add to this list, if you are able to back it up ๐Ÿ˜

1. Rockin' around the Christmas Tree โ€“ Okay, it's the 1950s, rock n roll is upon us. The world needed a song to really shake things up at Christmas. This is what we get. That vocal style, which may have been real hip for about a year, sounds cheezy and dated today. And the sassy spirit of this song makes it SOO much lamer than any of the songs its rebelling against.

Terrible lyrics include: โ€œLater we'll have some pumpkin pie and we'll do some carolingโ€- Great! Thanks for telling us what you'll do at your Christmas party... but who thought these would be song lyrics? And if that doesn't say rock 'n roll, I don't know what does. This song might have had a place in 1958, but I have no idea why we continue to hear it every year.

2. We wish you a merry Christmas - If there was ever a cool version of this song, I haven't heard it. Fortunately I dont think this gets recorded as much anymore. But still we are subjected to this annoying and repetitive melody countless times every year.

Terrible lyrics include: โ€œBring us some figgy puddingโ€ - I've never had figgy pudding at Christmas time or seen it for sale. If I heard people singing this outside my house, I wouldnt know what to think. I would probably expect a psychiatric unit to be on its way to take these people back to the hospital. I am dying to try figgy pudding though

3. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas โ€“ I always thought this song to be pretty much a snooze fest. It's surprising to me how many artists, good artists, have recorded this song. They may even make it tolerable. But this song really does stink.

Terrible lyrics include: โ€œMake the yule tide gayโ€ - First of all, what's a yule tide? Second of all, YOU make it gay! These lyrics are obviously dated, and I'm tired of songs that tell me what to do during my holiday. If I want to make something gay, believe me, I'll do it. I don't need any song to tell me!

โ€œFrom now on our troubles will be out of sightโ€ - The rest of the song is about celebrating THIS Christmas, then suddenly we'll have no more troubles in life EVER? That's quite a jump.

โ€œThrough the years we all will be together, if the fates allowโ€ is the only decent sentiment in this stinkfest of a song.

4. Jingle Bells โ€“ Undoubtedly the most famous Christmas song of all time, both among countries that celebrate Christmas and those that don't. I'm still trying to figure out why. The melody is so simple that it hits the same note seven times before it even changes notes.

Terrible lyrics include: โ€What fun it is to ride and sing a sleighing song tonightโ€ - โ€œA sleighing songโ€... as if there are many to chose from... as if this were a whole genre of music? If there are any other songs written about sleighing, I don't want to hear them.

โ€œSoon Miss Fanny Bright was seated by my sideโ€ - If all your life you tuned out after the first chorus and thought it was over, I wouldn't blame you, but there are more verses. Unless there's a sexual innuendo here, I don't get it. Why include a name that means nothing to nobody in the most famous Christmas song of all time?

5. Jingle Bell Rock โ€“ This song is almost as annoying as โ€œRockin' Around The Christmas Tree.โ€ I've heard it a million times and still waiting to hear anything that โ€œrocksโ€ even remotely.

Terrible lyrics include: โ€œDancing and prancing in jingle horse squareโ€ - Before we pick apart what exactly the difference is between dancing and prancing, lets keep in mind that this is the โ€œcoolโ€ Christmas song... I just don't think it has the same edge that it must have in 1959.
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Last edited by panman36 on 12/02/2015 19:05; edited 2 times in total
RockyRaccoon
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  • #2
  • Posted: 12/02/2015 18:53
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edit: ignore me
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Last edited by RockyRaccoon on 12/02/2015 19:35; edited 1 time in total
panman36
Gender: Male

Age: 44

United States
  • #3
  • Posted: 12/02/2015 19:15
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Sorry. My attempt at humor. What's so dumb about it? ๐Ÿ˜ข
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RockyRaccoon
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  • #4
  • Posted: 12/02/2015 19:32
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panman36 wrote:
Sorry. My attempt at humor. What's so dumb about it? :cry:


Oh my bad, I thought this was serious. I should've paid closer attention.
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Temporary33
  • #5
  • Posted: 12/02/2015 19:37
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I think it's funny how people set up the Christmas lights in November.
panman36
Gender: Male

Age: 44

United States
  • #6
  • Posted: 12/02/2015 19:43
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Well, some of it is kind of serious. I might have exaggerated a few points ๐Ÿ˜จ

But if my brand of humor falls flat, you're all right to let me know ๐Ÿ˜‰
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Last edited by panman36 on 12/02/2015 20:00; edited 1 time in total
Applerill
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Gender: Female

Age: 32

Location: Chicago
United States
  • #7
  • Posted: 12/02/2015 19:46
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Hmm, while I don't necessarily have a problem with any of the songs you named (Miley Cyrus's "Rocking Around the Christmas Tree" is a perennial banger), I sorta see what you're getting at. I used to be really into Christmas music in middle school, but today I often like the idea of listening to it than the act of listening to it itself. The chintz is often just too powerful.

Anyway, you all should listen to John Fahey's Christmas album. It's amazing.
JOSweetHeart
Gender: Female

Age: 43

Location: East Tennessee
  • #8
  • Posted: 12/03/2015 01:14
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The song that always makes me change the station is "All I Want For Christmas Is You" from that Vince Vance act. I can't stand the voice of that woman who sings it.

God bless you always!!! ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„

Holly
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CA Dreamin
Gender: Male

Location: LA
United States
  • #9
  • Posted: 12/03/2015 01:36
  • Post subject: Re: 5 famous Christmas songs that SUCK
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panman36 wrote:
But still we are subjected to this annoying and repetitive melody countless times every year.

No we're not because we have the right to not listen to it, or any other Xmas song. I enjoy the holiday season as much as anybody else, but I'm disinterested in the tunes that go along with it. Most of them have, as you say, shallow and poorly written lyrics.
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Age: 40

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  • #10
  • Posted: 12/03/2015 03:22
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There's some good ones out there tho


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