It's that time of year again. Like it or not, we will all be inundated with Christmas music for the next month. I happen to like Christmas music, generally speaking. But I can't let another holiday pass without calling out some songs that really suck. Feel free to add to this list, if you are able to back it up
1. Rockin' around the Christmas Tree – Okay, it's the 1950s, rock n roll is upon us. The world needed a song to really shake things up at Christmas. This is what we get. That vocal style, which may have been real hip for about a year, sounds cheezy and dated today. And the sassy spirit of this song makes it SOO much lamer than any of the songs its rebelling against.
Terrible lyrics include: “Later we'll have some pumpkin pie and we'll do some caroling”- Great! Thanks for telling us what you'll do at your Christmas party... but who thought these would be song lyrics? And if that doesn't say rock 'n roll, I don't know what does. This song might have had a place in 1958, but I have no idea why we continue to hear it every year.
2. We wish you a merry Christmas - If there was ever a cool version of this song, I haven't heard it. Fortunately I dont think this gets recorded as much anymore. But still we are subjected to this annoying and repetitive melody countless times every year.
Terrible lyrics include: “Bring us some figgy pudding” - I've never had figgy pudding at Christmas time or seen it for sale. If I heard people singing this outside my house, I wouldnt know what to think. I would probably expect a psychiatric unit to be on its way to take these people back to the hospital. I am dying to try figgy pudding though
3. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas – I always thought this song to be pretty much a snooze fest. It's surprising to me how many artists, good artists, have recorded this song. They may even make it tolerable. But this song really does stink.
Terrible lyrics include: “Make the yule tide gay” - First of all, what's a yule tide? Second of all, YOU make it gay! These lyrics are obviously dated, and I'm tired of songs that tell me what to do during my holiday. If I want to make something gay, believe me, I'll do it. I don't need any song to tell me!
“From now on our troubles will be out of sight” - The rest of the song is about celebrating THIS Christmas, then suddenly we'll have no more troubles in life EVER? That's quite a jump.
“Through the years we all will be together, if the fates allow” is the only decent sentiment in this stinkfest of a song.
4. Jingle Bells – Undoubtedly the most famous Christmas song of all time, both among countries that celebrate Christmas and those that don't. I'm still trying to figure out why. The melody is so simple that it hits the same note seven times before it even changes notes.
Terrible lyrics include: ”What fun it is to ride and sing a sleighing song tonight” - “A sleighing song”... as if there are many to chose from... as if this were a whole genre of music? If there are any other songs written about sleighing, I don't want to hear them.
“Soon Miss Fanny Bright was seated by my side” - If all your life you tuned out after the first chorus and thought it was over, I wouldn't blame you, but there are more verses. Unless there's a sexual innuendo here, I don't get it. Why include a name that means nothing to nobody in the most famous Christmas song of all time?
5. Jingle Bell Rock – This song is almost as annoying as “Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree.” I've heard it a million times and still waiting to hear anything that “rocks” even remotely.
Terrible lyrics include: “Dancing and prancing in jingle horse square” - Before we pick apart what exactly the difference is between dancing and prancing, lets keep in mind that this is the “cool” Christmas song... I just don't think it has the same edge that it must have in 1959. _________________ MOOOORE autotune!
Last edited by panman36 on 12/02/2015 19:05; edited 2 times in total
Hmm, while I don't necessarily have a problem with any of the songs you named (Miley Cyrus's "Rocking Around the Christmas Tree" is a perennial banger), I sorta see what you're getting at. I used to be really into Christmas music in middle school, but today I often like the idea of listening to it than the act of listening to it itself. The chintz is often just too powerful.
Anyway, you all should listen to John Fahey's Christmas album. It's amazing.
The song that always makes me change the station is "All I Want For Christmas Is You" from that Vince Vance act. I can't stand the voice of that woman who sings it.
God bless you always!!!
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Post subject: Re: 5 famous Christmas songs that SUCK
panman36 wrote:
But still we are subjected to this annoying and repetitive melody countless times every year.
No we're not because we have the right to not listen to it, or any other Xmas song. I enjoy the holiday season as much as anybody else, but I'm disinterested in the tunes that go along with it. Most of them have, as you say, shallow and poorly written lyrics.
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